Recently, I was given the great opportunity to speak at a women’s conference on the topic of Abiding and Peace. The leader of the church women’s ministry was the speaker on the topic of Abiding which is also the theme of the year to tie together a focus for all of the events and teaching for that group. It was quite an honor to be asked to speak because this is an audience who has a solid understanding of the truth of scripture and craves learning solid insights and hearing expository teaching.
I worked on my message on Peace for weeks and prayed for my words to be a conduit for a godly impact. I have included some excerpts of it here. The talk was about 45 minutes and I’m a better speaker than a writer, so hopefully the Lord will use this entry in some way to encourage you. Feel free to ask questions or provide any feedback you have on the content. I am happy to hear it, even if you have criticism but please be constructive.
There is a lot of vulnerability in these words…but not nearly as much as there could be. I have limited the details to protect those who didn’t make the choice to tell the story. These are excerpts of the message…
“To start out…I’d like to get a couple of basic definitions covered. In school (my profession is in education), we like to be sure that the vocabulary of the lesson is covered before digging into the concepts.
There is peace and then there is PEACE…!!
The definition of peace in Webster’s dictionary is a state of quiet or tranquility or calm. It is harmonious relations and freedom from disputes. In a sermon by John Piper, a widely followed author and preacher, he said it is an absence of conflict.
So what does the Word of God say about Peace and how does that compare with what we may be tempted to settle for as Webster defines it? We’ll be discussing that in earnest today. In Phillipians 4:7 Paul writes…7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. While preparing for today, I listened to a sermon by John Piper on Peace. As I listened, it was tempting to just copy the transcript and read it to you. But, in fairness to you all, I decided that was cheating so I’ll just be integrating some of the things he said into this talk. Mainly, I will share how he described 3 areas of conflict that impact our peace. I’ll share some examples from my life where I experienced all three.
…
Many of you have heard the phrase “peace that passes all understanding.” We can see in Philippians 4:7 that this is from scripture. This phrase is something I sometimes use when I am telling someone I’ll pray for them during a time of crisis, deep grief or overwhelming suffering. When I pray for this level of peace, I know that there is no earthly logic or reasoning that will provide that level of peace. If you’ve ever engaged with someone who needed this type of prayer, you also know that you have exhausted any answers you can offer. We all know how helpless we feel at that point.
The verses I have placed on the handout (see below) are foundational to our intentionally dwelling on what can provide the peace that passes all understanding.
There was a significant period of time in my life when I would not have been able to say that I lived by these verses nor did I have a lifestyle where I applied ABIDING to the point of experiencing the real, life changing or “me-changing”, daily PEACE of God.
I think that we all have a story to share and doing so sometimes helps others with something they are dealing with so if I say something today about my journey to this point that resonates with you, then God may be nudging you toward more of HIS PEACE as you apply His truth to what I’m sharing. So…a little background…
I was raised as the youngest of 4 siblings in a home of believing parents who were active in the church. The teachings and ministry of that church were not, however, grace based. Oh, there was scripture memory, bible quizzing, preaching and music and potlucks and evangelism, however the emphasis was not on grace but on judgment. The underlying belief system was that when we sinned we were no longer saved. Sins in this church included things like playing cards, dancing, attending movies and smoking-you know…the ones that are all in the bible (insert eye roll.) But what it essentially meant was that I had to be re-saved during every altar call. The result was that I learned to hide and be ashamed when I didn’t “measure up” to the expectations of a legalistic leadership and community.
I tell you this not to say that my spiritual problems were the fault of the church, but in a church where they twisted and added to the Gospel, I developed a mindset of who God was during my time there. It was an image of a God who was ready to lower the boom on me all the time. Some of you may have formed an image of God based on a relationship with your earthly father. That’s often inaccurate. My own earthly father was a God fearing man who read his bible, was faithful to his family, taught Sunday school and went “calling (knocking on doors)” weekly to invite the community to come to church. This entire talk could be about my dad’s good qualities but he did subscribe to the doctrines of the church which I now know was a spiritually dysfunctional situation for us all. Then God rescued me from that influence.
When I was in my early teens, my parents and I moved to Michigan and started attending Ward Presbyterian Church in Livonia. By then, my parents were tired of being church leaders and enjoyed just sitting and learning from the solid Bible teaching there. It was through the ministry of this church that I began to understand more about who God really was and what my response to His work in my life could mean when I stopped looking over my shoulder. Although I had believed in Christ as my Savior at the age of 8 years old and was baptized at that time, the discipleship part of my life took MUCH longer. Like many of you, I am by nature pretty headstrong and rebellious and this has impacted a great deal of my life.
It wasn’t until years later when I was in a college and careers small group that I learned about the sovereignty of God as THE provider and perfecter of our faith and how He does the work of regenerating our dead spirits to be able to follow Him. This changed my attitude toward Him as I began to understand how being adopted into the family of God meant I would never be UN-adopted. The church I was raised in had me continually questioning that truth. The doctrine of works righteousness promoted in many churches is sometimes obvious but sometimes very subtle and deceptive. If you have struggled with being good enough, let it be settled today that you will never be good enough and the ONLY way for you and I to be acceptable to Almighty God, our gracious heavenly Father, is to know and place our faith in Jesus Christ, the perfect and blameless Lamb of God. Jesus + Nothing=Everything!
If that’s the only PEACE you walk away with today, then this was time well spent.
…The kicker is that there is even more that we can enjoy through being His disciple here on earth…as we continue to repent or turn away from sin in our lives so that we grow more like Him, we gain the ability to enjoy fellowship with Him. In this process, we are preparing for eternity with Him. It took me a very long time to truly understand this. I mean decades!!
At the point where I understood the GRACE based truth of God’s plan, I believe my faith changed and I was able to shed the constant feeling of condemnation. Ephesians 2:8-9 says…For by grace you are saved through faith, and this not of your own doing . It is the gift of God, not a result of works so that no one may boast. So – that means, if I follow the rules of the legalistic church or an established religion and never lie or kill anyone or commit adultery or even ever get drunk, etc, etc…my clean living doesn’t get my name written into the book of life.
Moving past the college/career group days and into the years of marriage and raising a family, it has been an ongoing saga of my independence and willfulness and God’s provision of just enough obstacles to keep me uncomfortable in that mode. When we think about PEACE, does being “uncomfortable” seem compatible with that? I guess it depends on the kind of PEACE you’re talking about. Remember, there is peace and then there is PEACE.
John 14:7 uses the phrase “as the world gives” refers to peace that is temporary and based on circumstances or an application of coping mechanisms that don’t provide permanent results… Sometimes our peace comes from a sense of being in control of people and circumstances. I would say that the sense of control has been the number one “as the world gives” kind of peace for me but still not the PEACE that we all ultimately need – the kind that passes all understanding.
SO, when we think about what prevents that lasting and deep peace, let’s revisit the 3 areas of conflict that John Piper discussed.
Man vs. Man
The first area of conflict that Piper discussed is the conflict that man has with man. There are many things that happen in our relationships with people that impact our relationship with God and the same is true in reverse. Can we all think of at least one person who keeps us off balance? We know that our humanity bumps into others and sometimes, fireworks are the result or sometimes it’s just very awkward to find common ground with that person. We can all think of ways the other person needs to change, right? For example, maybe they just don’t understand you? If they would only take the time to reflect on THEIR faults, they would see that it’s them who is the problem. If this area of your life is impacting your ability to ABIDE in Christ, He wants to work on YOUR heart to help you act as Christ would. He does that through His Word and you knowing and applying it.
1 Thessalonians 5:12-15
12 We ask you, brothers, to respect those who labor among you and are over you in the Lord and admonish you, 13 and to esteem them very highly in love because of their work. Be at peace among yourselves. 14 And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle,[a] encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. 15 See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone.
This is an area that has been a struggle for me. I have been in churches all my life where there were people in leadership who were doing things or not doing things that I thought should be changed. Of course, when I was in my spiritual slumps, the lie I told myself was that if those people would just do what was right (in my eyes) then I would be a better Christian and we’d have a better church. Although there is always room for improvement in any church (by the way, if you know of a perfect church, don’t go there…because, well…you’re being there will mean it’s not perfect anymore…just saying.;-) ) In addition to the way we can sometimes have conflict with those in leadership, we are also likely to, at one point or another, have conflict with someone in our own church community. Our God of PEACE is a GOD of ORDER and He sets a very specific example of how to address offenses between us in the church. Even the world uses a close model to that of Matthew 18 when they apply the principles of Restorative Practices. I am trained to run these types of meetings and the “order” of it is what frames a successful outcome. We need to KNOW Matthew 18 and apply it. Too often, we take things to social media or other avenues and then the outcome is never PEACE.
In the churches where I have been aware of significant problems, I was sometimes lying to myself about who needed to change. In contrast, now that my relationship with Christ is stronger and more personal and I am doing better at ABIDING*…I have a different heart toward those who are in leadership. In fact, knowing that my critical heart has been at least a part of the problem in some cases, I am passionately committed to supporting my pastor and the rest of the leadership in my church through prayer and service. So, if you have a problem with the color of the carpet or the way they set the stage up or which choruses were sung on Sunday, I’m not your girl to share that with.
This topic of relationships and man vs. man conflict could be a conference all on its own but we do need to include it as one of the 3 areas because it’s a daily struggle to keep peace with people. Take a look at the verses included in the discussion guide to see which ones resonate with you.
Man vs. Nature
The next main area of conflict we have that is inescapable is with natural forces. We deal with storms, floods, extreme temperatures, a cloudy day (especially in Michigan) and we deal with illness – look at the Covid pandemic – and disease such as cancer, diabetes, heart disease and for many of us, especially as we get older, at least some level of arthritic aches and pain. For us as women, we deal with pain in childbirth, periods and menopause. It’s a real thing that we have a little more, ladies! It’s part of the consequences of living in a fallen world. We will have to deal with these things until Jesus comes again. We can’t escape it, even though we can sometimes have a temporary reprieve when there are no current storms or significant illnesses to deal with. During the pandemic we all had to deal with some very significant conflicts with nature…specifically the virus. We also may have lost a loved one or the shut down and isolation may have introduced a level of anxiety into our family life or impacted one of our children. We had a major cultural shift come about as a result of that season. In our family, we had a wedding that year along with a LIST of both related and unrelated issues to deal with. MOST significantly, my husband went through a spiral of health issues, so in June of that summer, I had to take him and drop him off at the ER which resulted in a hospitalization where I was not allowed to stay with him. His blood pressure in the ER was in the over 200 over 100 range and so after several days in the hospital and then months of testing we learned that he had kidney failure and Multiple Sclerosis.
Throughout that year, there were so many ways during that year that God clearly revealed His grace to me. Don’t get me wrong…I didn’t just become a pious sufferer. I had my moments during that year.
One such example was that because of Covid, we had to have my daughter’s wedding shower outside. The plan was to have it in our backyard. We have a walkout lower level with a brick patio that opens up to the yard. Not only did the moles have an extra active year which made placing tables and chairs under the table really interesting…but when I went to powerwash the patio a week prior to the shower, it wouldn’t work. There was really no option in my life to find another washer or to find someone to do it at that time (remember, it was COVID) and I remember just hanging my head and the tears started to flow and I said to God, “Really?!.. It’s a power-washer.” For perspective, picture me wondering if my husband will be able to walk her down the aisle in a month and if we’ll have another uptick that will mean canceling this wedding altogether…BUT it’s a power washer that is ruining my day. In that moment, there were no pious and faith filled prayers but more like a fist shaking and a tantrum about a dirty patio. I remember my husband coming downstairs to see how it was going and you don’t want to know what I said to him about the pattern of gas engines going bust in our house and how that was HIS responsibility. This man who is hardly able to make it up and down the stairs without taking a nap at that point and I’m venting to him about the powerwasher! And this was in the midst of God bringing us through with what I call our 2020 manna to that point. I was REALLY acting like the spoiled and impatient Israelites of Exodus. Well, we got past the powerwasher fiasco and had a lovely shower, with glorious weather and many more ways that God showed us His kindness and provision for the wedding day and much more. My husband was able to walk her down the aisle and even have a father daughter dance with her.
As we went through my husband’s health crisis, I started a Facebook group to request prayer for my husband. I have since downloaded the transcript of the entries from the beginning and for about 4 months. They weren’t always daily but it is a reminder of how God answered prayer throughout that time and how that encouraged us and anyone who followed the page. I read scripture to Him daily because he couldn’t read more than a page without mental exhaustion and we both embraced the season of a new appreciation for Psalm 23. The rest given by the Good Shepherd is so healing and comforting. This time of ABIDING in Him and His constant and tender care of all of the details of our lives was a “no turning back” time for me. I learned to truly LOVE our Savior like I never had before. I learned what the PEACE of GOD really meant. I learned that whether my circumstances were what I thought I wanted, God had a plan through them all – even a dirty patio…or an illness we never saw coming.
There are times in our lives where we may not feel the impact of circumstances on our “worldly peace.” We seem to be getting along with others or at least able to avoid those we don’t care for, there are no big issues to keep us up at night and it’s even a sunny 75 degree days with no pressing chores, and we FEEL at least for a minute like we are at peace in those areas of our lives.
Even in the times when the peace the world gives delivers at least temporary calm, we may still feel like there’s something wrong…we are still in chaos on the inside.. That’s where we need to consider the real and deeper issue…Regardless of whether our circumstances seem relatively manageable, what is happening in our hearts?
Man vs. God
Isaiah 26:3-4
3 You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. 4 Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock.
If the chaos inside continues amidst the circumstantial moments of either chaos or contentment outside, we don’t have PEACE with God… It’s time to reflect…Are we “staying” our mind on HIM? What exactly does that mean? Do we seek to find time in our day to read the Bible? Do we attend or at least listen to the Word preached? Are we listening to His voice through His Word? If so, what does that look like for you? Are you seeking after GOD’s PEACE? Or are you settling for the world’s “peace?”
When you are feeling “in control”…Do you sort of assume you’re doing okay without Him until it’s quiet and you have that God shaped void start to stir up inside of you?
2 Corinthians 10:5
5 We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ,
The word “arguments” and the phrase, “every lofty opinion” can be as deceptive as a complacent attitude. Whether or not we are at peace with man and with nature, are we tempted to slide into prideful thinking, forgetting to spend time in HIS WORD and time in praise and petition in prayer? This verse tells us we need to reflect on every thought we have and filter it with God’s truth to help us stay close to Him.
Isaiah 55:12 “For you shall go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and the hills before you shall break forth into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands.
Isaiah says that when we are made righteous by God, we will receive His blessing. Our repentant hearts are met with such amazing grace and blessing, even the mountains and hills are impacted. The promise there is that we will have joy and HIS PEACE- the SHALOM PEACE.
I’m going to close with this story found in a search of the internet on “illustrations on Abiding”
PRAY AND READ YOUR BIBLE
A man was in prison and was in need of some money. He wrote to his mother and asked her to send five hundred dollars immediately. Soon after, he got a package in the mail. It was a Bible. On the top of the Bible, there was a letter that said, “Son, I love you. Pray and read your Bible.”
The man was ticked off. He got on the phone and called his mother. “Mama, I appreciate the Bible, but what I need right now is five hundred dollars.”
She told him over the phone, “Son, pray and read your Bible.” He got more ticked off and hung up on his mother.
He then wrote a letter. “Mother, I know you believe in God, but that’s the problem with you Christians. You are so heavenly minded that you don’t know how to function in the real world. When I need five hundred dollars, I don’t need a Bible. I need a check for five greenbacks! If I need money, don’t send me a Bible and tell me to pray!”
He got a letter back that said, “Son, pray and read your Bible.”
He was so irritated at his mother, that for the six months he was in jail that Bible stayed in the corner.
After a long while, he finally got out. His mother was there to meet him. He could hardly speak to her. “Mama, you let me down. I needed you as my mother and you let me down.”
She said, “What do you mean, son?”
“I wrote you. I called you. I begged you for five hundred dollars and every time you gave me this same old line to pray and read my Bible.”
“Well, son, did you pray and read your Bible?”
“Yeah, I prayed and read my Bible, and I’m still as broke now as I was when you told me the first time to pray and read my Bible.”
“Son, do you have your Bible?”
He reached in his bag and he handed her the book.
“Son, let me ask you one more time. Did you pray and read your Bible?”
“Yes, Mama. I told you I prayed and read my Bible.”
“Son, you neither prayed nor read your Bible.”
She opened up the Bible and at every major divisional section within the text, there was a hundred-dollar bill taped inside of it. If the boy would have just read his Bible he would have understood that the thing he was looking for was in the text. Because he didn’t take seriously the Word of God, what the Word of God had to offer he never received.
*If you’re not connecting that the reference to ABIDE is to develop a daily, moment by moment, reliance on the presence of Jesus in your life, please let me know if you’d like more information on how to approach that as a habit in your life. 1 John 5 talks about His commandments NOT being burdensome. Learn how to carry your cross without the burden of sin weighing it down.